I don’t need BOTOX! I’m sure of it. I think…

Hello there. If you care about me enough to check this blog, I figured the least I could do is update it every now and then! In one word, life in Madrid is better. My class registration is finally correct (after two weeks of instruction no less). Although I have to rewrite my notes, focus with every ounce of my brainspace, sleep with the diccionario, and go to tutoring-my struggle with advanced Spanish classes will be a distant memory when I walk across the graduation stage on May 17^th. At the moment, this isn’t even remotely fun, BUT-in the words of my parents (and Denzel in “The Great Debators”) I’m going to do what I have to do so I can do what I want to do. And right now… I have to study like there’s no tomorrow.

In my last cranky blog I realized that there was something different about this trip. Clearly, I’m not frolicking in the shadows of the Great Sphinx at sunset or sipping chai with Burmese girls at the Shwedagon Pagoda. But beyond the obvious, there was just something about THIS trip that made me feel a bit apathetic for the first few weeks. When I told my mom that I hadn’t taken many pictures, it hit me. I LIVE here. I’m not just vacationing in Europe to see the sites. I attend the Complutense just like 30,000 other students. When I run down the escalators of the Metro trying to catch the next train, I could be anyone-a mother rushing to pick up little ones, an economist trying to beat the clock, a salesgirl at Zara, or…just me.

It’s ironic to know that I’m living my life, establishing a sense of normalcy, and “doing me”-all apart from everything that I’ve ever known and loved. As I think about my next big move, I have to admit that a fog of anxiety and absolute dread creeps over my countenance. I DO look forward to my future. But the time between now and then-the space between the known and the unknown..AHHHHH!!!! It just makes me want to scream. Out loud. Scratch that. VERY LOUD.

I found a bit of clarity in this line from Barack Obama’s South Carolina VICTORY speech. He said, “The choice in this election is not between regions or religions or genders. It’s not about rich versus poor; young versus old; and it is not about black versus white. It’s about the past versus the future."

Clearly, I’m not running for office anytime soon, but I do feel as if I’m in the middle of a mud-slinging, word-jabbing campaign between Rhonda and Rhonda. This IS about the past versus the future, and as I weigh my options (and thank GOD for them) I am silenced by the possibility of great success and equally strong misdirection. So...I wait, and pray, and wait, and email, and revise the resume, and sit, and pray some more.

All of this waiting incites more than a bit of tension in my life. After getting “put in my place” by my dear friend Julie, I looked in the mirror and saw this WRINKLE across the top of my forehead-that didn’t seem to go away. I tried smiling, fake laughing, and closing my eyes. When I opened them, it was still there. Talk about depressing. At that moment I knew that I had to do something because I was either going to drive myself to an early grave or to BOTOX by my 25^th birthday, so...I went shopping.

After about 14 hours of browsing, bargain hunting and admiring my future purchases at boutiques like La Perla and D&G, my wrinkle was gone!! The only thing missing was Tiffany, my older sister-and ultimate shopping partner. Her marathon shopping makes ME tired, and I can go for days it seems! That’s exactly how I spent this weekend…strolling through outdoor outlet villages, mega malls, and tiny shops. I drowned my cares in silk, bling, metallics, and cashmere.

I’m sure you may be wondering how much this little excursion cost me? Come on, you know you want to know how many Euros I dropped. Well, this I know for sure. It cost less than my impending BOTOX. Consider it preventative treatment, coming soon to an HMO near you.

Always,

Rhonda

P.S. I’m still recovering. Feel free to send get-well cards to this address.

Rhonda Allen

International Studies Abroad

C/ Mayor n°4, 5 Planta, Oficina 10

28013 Madrid

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